Pandemic Problems
The proposition is simple: focusing on your breathing and learning to notice your thoughts without judgment will help your mind. As someone with a natural tendency to be anxious, this is a compelling offer.
At the start of the pandemic, one app gave away a year’s subscription and I used it.
We were in Poland at the time. We were strangers in a strange land during a strange time. I had many reasons to be anxious. Poland had never been a part of our plan. I had raised support as a missionary to the UK, but changes in visa policies forced me out of the country I had made my home. My relationship with the church we were serving with in Poland had become very strained. My dad was recovering from brain surgery a million miles away. We didn’t know what was coming next for our family or how we would endure until whatever came next finally arrived.
And so I used the app. I did the whole mindfulness thing. While the kids did their school work, if I had a break from trying to do what work I could, I would put my headphones on and go through a guided meditation. Breathing deep, counting breaths, learning to see my thoughts in front of me and to dissociate myself from them.
It seemed to help, at least for a time. It was a break from having to be on. It was a reprieve from everything that was going on around me.
Ultimately, it was just breathing. There was nothing more.
The promise of mindfulness meditation
Something I have noticed, even in myself, is a temptation to think that I have a use for things like meditation apps, or just meditation practices in general. We live in a materialist society which does not have space for the transcendent. Mindfulness meditation promises to be a secular, dogma-free zone in what is usually considered to be hippy-dippy, crunchy, and mystical. It’s a science lab in Sedona.
I looked at the marketing material for what seems to be the biggest player in this space, and it promises to calm your anxieties, organise your thoughts, and help you sleep. They’ve introduced an AI companion that is there for you 24/7.
It does not take much to see why this is tempting. It treats the simple act of breathing and thinking as medicine which can treat your existential dread. Yet, it is a promise which necessarily comes up empty.
One songwriter sings, “No matter where you may go, you’re gonna take yourself with you…”1
This is the final problem with mindfulness: you are trying to use your own, pained mind to fix yourself. It is trying to use the very tool which is hurting you to make yourself well.
These things promise to help sort out your issues, but they can only show that your problems are deeply intwined with yourself. It offers no answers, no solutions, nothing concrete to take hold of to lift yourself out of the mire of your existence.
I bring all of this up because I am a Christian in ministry and I took the bait. I tried it while ignoring the very thing which was on offer to me in the gospel: access to God himself.
The gift of Christian Prayer
If the promises of mindfulness meditation sound familiar, it is because they are the Temu-version of what Christians call prayer. The promise is mental clarity, peace, calmness, and a listening ear. However, what is actually being supplied is breath control and a robot to talk to.
What the Christian has access to in prayer is far better.
Real communication
Throughout scripture, the reality of prayer is that it is real communication with God.
…and the people of Israel groaned because of their slavery and cried out for help. Their cry for rescue from slavery came up to God. And God heard their groaning… (Exodus 2:23-24)
When we pray, we are communicating with a real Person. God is real, he is there, and he is listening.
I waited patiently for the LORD;
he inclined to me and heard my cry. (Psalm 40:1)
He is not far off. And by his grace, he makes himself available to his people. This is the same God who created all that we can and cannot see. The great comfort that is on offer in him is that he has not left his people alone but has promised his presence with them in Christ. If you are a Christian, you are in Christ and nothing can separate you from him. And so he hears your prayers.
This ought to give us great comfort but also see how hollow the promise of mindfulness is. The idea of talking to an AI companion is that it won’t judge you or be embarrassed by what you say to it.
And yet, God is there, ready and willing to hear your prayers to him. He is not afraid of you. He is not ashamed of you. He isn’t embarrassed by what you might share with him because he already knows it. This is why Jesus teaches us that we do not need to “heap up empty phrases” when we pray. You don’t have to soften the blow when you bring your pain and your shame to God. He already knows what you need before you ask him.
Real community
The gift of Christian prayer is that it also takes place in the context of community. While it is available to us on an individual level, prayer is incredibly powerful in the context of real community.
This is why the church prayer meeting and small groups are so special. It is through prayer, together, that our love abounds more and more with knowledge and all discernment (Phil. 1:9). When we pray, Jesus himself is with us. Corporate prayer reminds us that the gospel is about more than just me and Jesus but about God preparing a people for himself who are zealous for good works (Titus 2:14).
Prayer is an expression of love for my church family because I am bringing their cares and concerns before the King of all Creation. It is to enter into the royal throne room and bow before God knowing that only he can answer prayer.
None of this can be accomplished by breath control or a robot.
Real, constant access
A third aspect of the appeal of mindfulness is that it’s something that you can, technically, practice anywhere. You don’t need any equipment, although noise-cancelling headphones and a £50/year subscription help.
Yet again, we have the same and better on offer when we consider the gift of prayer.
We can pray before we eat, as we are cooking, as we are getting ready for the day, before we start working, while we are working, while we are commuting to work… There is never a time when prayer is unavailable to us. There is nothing under the sun that we cannot pray about. If it is a part of the life of the Christian, then it’s fodder for prayer.
This means that there is never a time when the Creator of the entire universe is unavailable to us. When was the last time that you considered this? If you are a Christian, then God has promised to be with you always. He is always available to you, to carry you through your day. He is listening when you are nervous about that job interview or hospital appointment. He is with you as you are preparing food for your family. He is there to comfort you when you think through everything that embarrassed you today.
And so I urge you, don’t be drawn in by the promise of mindfulness. It is empty and it is meaningless.
Turn, instead, to God himself. He knows you, he knows what you are going through, and he is with you.
Rose Elinor Dougall, Take Yourself With You
The phrase 'a science lab in Sedona' is sharp and true. What strikes me about your distinction is that mindfulness offers a witness within the self — prayer offers a Witness beyond it, who knew us before we drew the first breath. Augustine's restlessness was not a problem to be regulated by breathwork; it was the soul's compass pointing toward its true home. Do you think the great deception of the wellness age is not the practice itself, but the quiet relocation of God from Person to Process?